Letting Go and Taking Control

Today I decided I had to take back control of my life. Over the past couple of months I have noticed myself falling once again into my old habit of getting too involved in the lives of my friends and family; taking on their problems as if they are my own. And it was taking its toll on my mind and body.

Physically, I was starting to feel the anxiety; Pains, tightness, and tenseness in my chest from fretting and worrying. Mentally, I was unable to focus on any one specific task at home and couldn’t motivate myself to start or finish any projects that needed to be done. It all just seemed to be too overwhelming so I haven’t done anything.

The fact that we’ve had only a few days of full blown sunshine over the past couple of months probably hasn’t helped my mental attitude. I have very little patience and seem to get angry way too easily … guess you’d say I was “sweating the small stuff.”

Today was the turning point. The sun was shining this morning and my husband and I took off for a solo cruise in the Miata. I had a difficult time relaxing at first even though I so enjoy our cruises. The tenseness in my chest was so much more obvious today. So I made the decision that I had to let go for my health; I had to let go of my fears for my brother and brother-in-law and their personal battles with cancer; I had to realize that the household tasks that need to be done outside are not going to get done until the weatherman quits calling for rain.

I started repeating in my head: My life is good. I have my health. I must let go of others problems. Over and over I said this. Soon the tenseness left me. The anxiety dissipated. After ½ hour of driving and repeating these statements in my head, I was able to relax and enjoy the day!!

I know it won’t be easy. It’s hard for me to not think of the issues that those close to me face on a daily basis. But I just have to remember not to personalize their problems any longer. I can still care. I just have to ensure I don't literally “feel” their pain.

They say that you can change a habit with three weeks of repetition. I am hoping this theory will help me change this habit!! Wish me luck …..

Until next time ……..
~ BOptimistic ~