Monday, August 17, 2015

I Really am Doing Fine ......

My three (3) year post surgery anniversary is coming up in mid September 2015. I'd like to forget that I’ve ever had cancer, but the thought really never does go away completely. Once you’ve had cancer, it is always quick to give you a fright. Every little ache or pain becomes magnified – like an echo in a barrel. But so far, so good! Right now I’m fine and still sticking by my ‘One day at a time’ motto … which goes hand in hand with my favourite saying, ‘It is what it is’. I remain optimistic in light of it all. The odds are good that GCT will pop up again, but that doesn’t mean it will. See! Optimism galore! ;-)

I can only assume that others who have been through their own struggles with cancer can share this - I expect it’s common. Lately I have noticed a little extra something when people I haven’t seen in awhile ask how I am doing. Perhaps it’s because I’ve had so many recurrences over the past 13 years. Whatever the reason, I answer this question with my normal, “I’m fine today. One day at a time, you know” accentuated with a smile. (I used to say, “I’m doing great!” until the 3rd and 4th recurrence. Then I figured I should add the ‘warning’.) ;-)

It’s nice that people are concerned and I do greatly appreciate that they ask. But what’s up with the intense look that some seem to give? It seems like they intentionally tilt their heads so they can look me directly in the eye, like they are trying to look deep in my soul to see if I’m telling the truth! And I feel obligated to repeat that I am, indeed, doing well. No need to worry, I’m fine. And ‘poof’.  Just like that the conversation has flipped from them being concerned about me to me being concerned that they are worried about me. Sometimes the feeling is so strong that I almost feel obligated to call them later to make sure THEY are OK! lol

But hey, that’s fine. I hope they don’t stop asking …. because as long as they do, that means they care (well, in most cases)! lol 

Until next time!

~ B-Optmistic ~