It was a VERY long day yesterday. We left home around 7:30
a.m. for the 4 ½ drive to Halifax. With my appointment at 2 o’clock, unknown
construction delays, and a planned stop at Murphy’s Fish & Chips for lunch,
we did not want to be rushed. We got lost once just as we arrived in Halifax when
I tried to use my tablet as a guide. Yup, it is just like reading a map and I
guess my record for that one goes untarnished – still not my forte. lol So out
came the GPS and she guided us through the maze of streets and traffic to our
destination – a full ½ hour before the appointment.
I was hurting by the time we got there and had a very difficult
time standing up straight when I walked the long distance from the car to the
Oncologist’s office. The pain from sitting and being jostled by the constant dodging of potholes had taken its toll. But one thing is for certain … being in agony during my examination easily
communicated to the Oncologist that my pain rating of 8 out of 10 wasn’t
exaggerated. And, if I had been fine, I probably would not have pushed my
desire to have a quick surgery date as effectively. After all, who wants to
have surgery when they are feeling great??
The actual consultation was a good and positive one. There
were no surprises; there is only one tumour and he says it is ripe for picking!
He is confident going in that it will be no worse than in the past. And he was
very pleased that this recurrence is more than four years out, compared with
the last one that occurred within one year.
His warnings regarding the actual surgery are all the same –
the tumour could be brushing up against the stomach and/or the small or large
bowel, a fact that could result in the scraping or removal of part of the
affected area to prevent future problems. He was pleased that we have been
fortunate in the past not to have to remove any portion of the bowel, so he has
lots to work with if a resection is required. Fingers crossed that this won’t
be needed.
I had joked four years ago about installing a zipper to make
future surgeries easier. He took me seriously, saying that he didn’t think it would
work well in my situation. Say what? They really do that, I said? Apparently
they do. So this time, he remembered what I had said and joked about ‘our
zipper technique’. Love this guy!
But with all the talk of the things that could happen during
surgery, when the discussion came around to post surgery I once again reminded
him that I am still anti-chemo. Well, here’s where the angels sang, lightning
flashed, and I swear I heard a brass band strike a tune in the hallway – he actually
bowed his head and then admitted that he has to now agree with my views on chemo. Wow! Another
“Say What?” moment. After seven years of having to reiterate my anti-chemo
thoughts, it is wonderful that he has finally come around to my side, and of his own
accord. He has always agreed with my argument that there is no evidence chemo would work for me, but he always said I should consider that it might be necessary. This is
the first time that he has come right out and said that that he backs me up.
What a relief ….. And what a large smile I must have been sporting at that
point in time.
Now don’t get me wrong. Chemo might be right for some people
and help for certain cancers, but not for GCT. There is no proof that it works for
those of us with this disease, but there is plenty of evidence that it causes other
very serious complications, including irreparable nerve and organ damage. Since I return to
a healthy status in between surgeries, I am pleased that I will continue to be
able to forego treatment and continue to do that.
The consultation was an hour long. The drive home was so
much longer! I was stress free mentally. However, the stress on my body was more
horrendous than I realized. When I got in the house, I could barely walk up the
two flights of stairs to my bedroom. And, when I finally made it, I was
shivering uncontrollably, probably on the verge of exhaustion. It’s amazing how
your body can hold up as long as it has to. I crashed. I was shaking and
freezing and with a lot of effort on my part, got changed into my night clothes
and immediately - and with much effort - crawled under the covers to get warm. I
didn’t even have the energy to open my eyes when Willie came up to check on me.
I was asleep within minutes. Two hours later I awoke feeling halfway human again.
Today, after a wonderful sleep - I swear I never moved a
muscle all night long – I find that the pain in my side has improved a great
deal. I won’t be doing anything crazy (like housework lol), but at least I can
move about without holding my side and moaning loudly with pain. Fingers crossed that things continue to improve as the days go on. J
So, as it stands, I should get a call with my surgery date
sometime in the near future. However, if I have another painful incident like I
had this past Sunday – which is caused, he suspects, by the tumour bleeding
into itself - I am to make my way to the nearest ER and have them call my
Oncologist to arrange a transfer to Halifax, if necessary. I will be praying
that this action will not be required … I’m willing to wait a few weeks!!
Until next time ……
~B-Optimistic ~
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